Day 282

It's Wednesday night and I have to say, today has been a good day. I was able to spend my birthday with Beck and the rest of my family. It started out early as always. I'm going to sleep good tonight. I've only gotten about six hours of sleep in the last two days and nights, so I'm making it on caffeine and sheer determination. Beck and I got up at the same time and I made some coffee, then fixed her a bowl of cereal and made the kid's lunches. Beck went back to bed for a while, and I cleaned up and worked out a little. Then she wanted to lay on the couch, so I tucked her in and we watched Netflix for a bit. I fixed her some yogurt with sliced strawberries, black berries, and raspberries. We relaxed for a while, then I got her dressed and out the door. I was determined to get her out of the house today. We went to the grocery store and I pushed her in the wheelchair and pulled the cart behind me. We came back here and I fixed us a hoagie and she ate some slaw, but she was hurting so she took a pain pill and laid back down. Around four O'clock, she woke up and I helped her to her chair. We ordered pizzas and ate, then people started coming over and we had a birthday party for me. My Stepdad and Mom brought the cake and all of the snacks, and pretty much everyone showed up. I was so glad because I wanted them to see Beck. She stayed in her chair the entire time so we had the party in the living room. Everything went wonderfully and Beck had a good time, but as soon as they left, she was ready to go to bed, so I gave her the nightly medicines and tucked her in. 

Today was a blessing in several different ways. For one, Beck was sharper today than she has been, and she didn't stay in bed all day. Her appetite is still good so she had enough strength to stay awake all day. The fact that I got her out of the house was a miracle, but she wanted to go. The weather has been fantastic and the sun feels good to her. We had fun at the store just being together, and everyone that usually asks about her flocked to her and gave her hugs. Beck felt bad that she couldn't get out to buy me anything for my birthday, so we ordered a new "Washington Redskin Robert Griffin III" jersey from her and the kids. 

I can't and won't complain today. I know that it's the calm before the storm, but I'm going to enjoy it. I love my Baby so much, and I told her just that several times today, usually when I'm helping her stand up. That is when my mouth is at her ear, and I always whisper, "I love you". So far, she has always whispered it back to me. I'll never get tired of hearing it. Tomorrow, I'm going to make a recording of her talking for the kids. I'm sure that there are things she wants to say to them, and we are going to put it on a disk tomorrow. She still has the sweetest voice in the world, and it's music to my ears. When Becka tells me she loves me, it's validation to me that I've done something right finally. Before I met her, I never did anything worthy of someone else's love, but she stole my heart and I learned that love isn't just a word. It's a bond that God creates between two people. I've never felt about anyone the way I feel about her, so I know that these feelings are being felt by me for the first time. The fact is that until I loved God, I wasn't capable of loving someone else, and now that I do, I'm not capable of being away from it. I long for her. I see her parents holding hands, and I understand how they feel about each other, while I wish I could have it too. I'd give anything and everything to be holding her hand and looking in to her eyes in thirty years. If only we could, but we still have today, so I'm going to her now and touch her face, kiss her eyelids, and thank God for today. That's all I can have, and I'll take it.

Okay, I've put myself somewhere I don't want to be, so I'm going to stop here. Thank you to everyone for the birthday wishes and gifts. My birthday was complete, because I got everything I wanted. Another day with Beck.

Sweet Dreams and God Bless.