Thursday night and I just got back from taekwondo. They gave me another trophy tonight, this one for breaking! I dedicated it to Becka and choked some people up, including myself. All of them know about her illness and they miss her. She'll be back soon! It won't be long before she's kicking and punching again. It's not the same without her. She's sick tonight, has been all day. It's not real bad but the Chemo is kicking in. She's already gone to bed. I just checked on her and told her about tonight. She got some beautiful flowers from my mother and that made her happy! Tomorrow I'm going to walk with her around the neighborhood. The doctor said that no matter how she felt, it was very important to walk as much as possible. I can't say I know how she feels, but I do know my wife pretty darn well, and she feels lousy. I guess it's something that is necessary. I'm going to ask God one day. All will be revealed.
For now, I need to have faith in his plan and know that he is healing her through the doctors and medicines. He has to have a plan more glorious than this for his daughter. One day she will look back and remember that he walked with her through all of this, and give him praise, but for now she's sleeping. I want my wife back Lord, the way she was. I want her to feel good again and enjoy life to the fullest. I want to take her places and see things we've never seen together, and we are going to. I can promise you that! One day she and I are going to St Thomas in the Virgin Islands. We are going to Israel on a Holy Land tour. We are going to Brasil so I can see where she grew up and see her father's church. This WILL happen, I have no doubt.
I'm going to bed to lay down with her. I'm grateful today for my sobriety and for my family. God removed the demons from my life and he put me here to take care of her and the kids. I love her more every minute of every day. I would lay down my life for her if need be. Becka is that special, but if you have met her, you already know that!
God Bless and please pray that the effects of the Chemotherapy don't get any worse than they are.
More to come......
