Sunday night and I just realized that we are coming up on a year with this blog. I just put Becka to bed. Her parents left a few minutes ago. I had to get up for a second. One of the neighborhood morons was shooting rockets right next to my house. When he saw me coming down the road in only a pair of shorts and a cell phone, he ducked in to his house. I told the neighborhood kids to tell him to stop. She needs her rest. I gave her a shower and used a scented scrub that my Aunt gave her. She loves it and I had already heated up the bed with the bed warmer, so she's resting comfortably. The doctors have cut her steroids back and I gave her a pain pill as well. I just pray she sleeps all night. We have been getting up during the night three or four times. She can't walk or pull herself up without help. I also took her contacts out for her. I'm getting better at putting them in and taking them out. It's not as easy as it looks! Her Dad and I went to Panera Bread tonight and he bought a bunch of bagels. Her appetite is good because of the steroids.
Laura and Hanna left today, so tonight it's only us. On one hand it feels empty and I'm a little fearful, but on the other, our family is together and she's not in pain. It's amazing really. God has given her peace. She's not hurting or afraid, and she's the one fighting. I believe she has an angel with her. So many people have been praying for her. It only makes sense that God would answer those prayers.
Life has changed so much in such a short period of time. It seems like only yesterday, we were planning our retirement, talking about buying a motor home and seeing the country. We wanted to go to Washington DC together. She has been but I haven't. She was going to show me the Veteran's wall, the Lincoln Memorial, the White House, the Capital Building, and the Smithsonian. DC in the spring was one of our plans. Now it all revolves around caring for her and making sure she has what she needs. On one hand, it hurts my soul, because I would give anything to turn back the clock two years and know what we know now. On the other hand, besides healing her, I wouldn't change a thing. No matter what happens next, this is where I belong and where I want to be. I know that the storm is coming. It may be cloudy outside, but the storm hasn't gotten here yet. We are ready for it when it does though. Without the help of family and friends, there is no way I could get through this. Becka's sisters are both very strong, Christian women with hearts bigger than most people I've ever met, and her parents are rocks. My family has been fantastic through all as well. I have no complaints.
I'm calling it a night. God Bless and I'll see you tomorrow I hope.
