Day 126

It's Monday night and this is going to be exceptionally short because I'm shaking all over. I just got home from the most intense work out I've ever undertaken. I know it's good for me, but I didn't know if I was going to be able to drive home. My master wants everyone to be in the same shape he is, but I swear you could strap C-4 to him and throw him off a fifty story building, and it would just make him mad. He's a world champion. I'm a forty four year old broken down mechanic. It's okay though, but my head is really starting to hurt, so I'm going to bed. Becka is doing fabulous! We haven't gotten her results back yet, so I guess that  no news is good news!

I'm really starting to feel bad, so I'm going to lay down. God Bless and I'll update tomorrow.

Day 125

It's Sunday night and I'm just now sitting down at 9:30pm. It's been a great Easter weekend here. I had to work yesterday, and today we were gone, so I finally got my housework done tonight. I pulled the stove out and cleaned behind it and I "GI'd" our bathroom. You can eat off the floor, but I wouldn't recommend it. We had a great dinner at my Mother's house, although I could tell she was in pain the whole time. She threw her back out about a week ago. Please pray with me that it will stop hurting soon.

I had a revelation today. I got real anxious when I thought about going to my mother's. I have become severely claustrophobic over the years. I stop breathing and get extremely irritated when I'm in a crowd of people, even my family members. I've always had a problem with crowds, but it has gotten worse to the point where I start hyperventilating just thinking about it. It's alright though. I usually just walk outside for a minute. I'm sure everyone thinks I'm being a jerk, but if they only knew. Anyway, the revelation I had wasn't about that. I got home and sat down for a minute and started watching "Facing the Giants" which is one of my favorite movies. The coach was talking to his players about living for God in every aspect of their lives. It hit me that I hardly ever do. I pray, then I go about my day as if I'm in control. I should be living every second for the glory of God, no matter what I am doing during the day. I'm not going to make this sound like a sermon. It's just something I need to work on. When things go right, I need to praise him. When things go terribly wrong, I need to praise him, and I need to live the way I feel, which is grateful. I'm grateful for the fact that he is healing Becka. I'm grateful for the fact that he healed me and gave me this life. I'm grateful for today, the day that we as Christians rejoice in the fact that our Lord is risen. I know that we say "He is Risen" quite a bit. It's become a slogan, but I need to remember what that means. He rose after paying the price that I owe. Everything I've ever done wrong in my life or will do again, he bore the punishment, and he rose so that we can live forever. After all that he has done for me, he deserves the best "Me" I can be. Becka is feeling so much better and it's because he loves us and is healing her. We never thought a year ago that we would be where we are today, but our family is closer, and we are closer to God. If nothing else, that makes everything worth it. I know she is the one who has to go through this, and we are still afraid, but there is hope in my house, and to be honest, hope and love are all we need.

God Bless and thanks! Happy Easter to all! Same time tomorrow.

Day 124

Saturday night before Easter and things are fabulous! God is so good, I can't say that enough. I had to work all day, then came home and we went to Verizon. Autumn saved her money and bought herself a new phone. I'm proud of her! We came back here and dyed Easter eggs, and now we are watching 24. Life is actually normal. I haven't thought about Becka being sick all day, because she hasn't been. We had Chinese food for supper. I bought some very spicy General TSO Chicken and she loved it. Spicy stuff seems to appeal to her. Tomorrow we are spending Easter with my mother.

It's been a great day!

God Bless and I promise I'll write more tomorrow.

Day 123

It's Friday night and we are watching "24". Beck has never seen it and we are watching from the first episode. Jack Bower is a bad dude! She's been a little sick today but is better tonight. We went shopping at Walmart together and then brought some burgers home for the kids. It's going to be a great Easter! We are going to celebrate the resurrection together as a family. Becka is making several things for Easter dinner. I don't know what they are called, but they are good! I'm making mashed potatoes and we are all getting together at my Mother's house. The family will be glad to see her doing so well. I know I am!

Things are good tonight and every night that I'm with her. We are fixing to go to bed. I have to work all day tomorrow for being out the other day with her at the doctor. God Bless and thanks for everything! Same time tomorrow Good Lord willing! She's feeling good and her tumors are shrinking. God is so good!

Day 122

It's Thursday night and we just got home from Becka's scan. It took almost three hours, but it's worth every second. This scan will finally tell us what we have been waiting to hear, that her cancer is in remission. I didn't know what PET stood for until tonight. PET stands for Positron Emission Tomography, and CT stands for Computerized Tomography. A PET scan is the most state of the art scan because it can distinguish between living and dead tissue at the molecular level. You would think that they would order this kind of scan to begin with, but that's up to the insurance companies. I hope and pray that the Supreme Court finds Obamacare unconstitutional. I don't want some panel of old fogies in Washington deciding how to treat my wife. I want her doctor's to do that.

We left the hospital and went by the "Hero House". Becka ate a lamb Gyro on Pita bread! Her appetite is coming back and I love it! She's lost five more pounds on the Becka Patton Starvation Diet. It's very successful if you want to lose seventy pounds in three months. Maybe Dr Phil will have her on! All kidding aside, it's wonderful to see her enjoying food again. I'm glad they put off her Chemo until after Easter so that she can enjoy Easter dinner. She and I are watching a new show called "Missing". It's pretty good if I do say so myself. She just got cold so she put on some socks, inside out. She always wears them inside out because she doesn't like the seam. I think it's a fashion statement! Autumn never wears matching socks, so they can get together and start a trend. Unmatched socks worn inside out!

Life is awesome today, better than it ever has been. We have renewed hope for the future and we are going to take full advantage of it. There is still some fear involved as to why Becka's lymph nodes are enlarged, but she's come this far. We are over the hill and the rest is downhill. My faith is strong and God is in charge. I'm so grateful for the answers to prayer! I said that all I wanted was "time", and he gave it to us. Thank you Lord!

God Bless and good night! Tomorrow is a new day. Always remember one thing. The ONLY people I ever need to get even with are the ones who have helped me!

Day 121

It's Wednesday night and I'm getting a late start. I just got home from class after I came home and fell asleep. It's been a good day! Becka is eating more and more, and enjoying it. We got GREAT news tonight concerning finances and our living situation, so we might be moving. I hate to move and we love this house, but if it comes through we will save six thousand dollars a year for the same size house in the same neighborhood. I can move us with dollies and a wheel barrel, literally. With the money we would save, we could buy a very nice car, so it's a no brainer. An incredible, wonderful, Christian man who owns several houses in the neighborhood is going to help us. He comes by from time to time to see Becka, and he was ecstatic when I told him about her test results. God Bless him and people like him who sacrifice for others.

Becka has gone to bed and I'm right behind her. Her PET scan is tomorrow and Andrew has an appointment in the morning, so I'm hitting the hay. God Bless and I'll update after the scan, but so far things are fantastic! All glory to God and thanks for his Grace. He is healing my love, and I am eternally grateful!

Good night!

Day 120 Continued

Tuesday is coming to an end. It's been a fabulous day! We are watching "Biggest Loser". We love this show because it changes people's lives. Our lives were changed today somewhat. Becka was given a new lease on life. She's still worried about her lymph nodes being inflamed, but I'm not. I'm thrilled about the progress, and I'm sure that she's close to remission. God is good! She has a PET scan Thursday, so we will know for sure.

I just got back from picking up the kids and driving an hour and a half in a wicked thunderstorm, so I'm pooped. We had barbecued pork for supper and Becka ate well! David is leaving us in the morning early. I've enjoyed having him here very much and so has Beck. We are going to miss him a lot! I'm going to bed in a few, but I have to say thank you to every one of you. I know you have been praying and crying with us, and it won't be forgotten. God Bless and good night! I'll write some more tomorrow!

Day 120

It's Tuesday and it's the best day I've had in what seems forever! The sun is shining, the birds are singing, and Becka's Chemotherapy is working! We had an appointment with her Doctor today and he said that the tumor in her lung had shrunk more than half, and he expects the others to have done the same. The only concern he has is that her Lymph Nodes are swollen, so he is ordering a PET scan, but lymph nodes swell for any number of reasons. The important thing is that the Chemotherapy and the radiation has shrunk and is killing the tumors! We are overjoyed at this news. God is truly good, he really is! He answers prayer as well, and I've told him over and over from my knees that if he would heal her, I would give him all the glory, so here it is! She is on the road to remission by all counts. We walked in the office today with fear and desperation, and we skipped out! I'm not putting the cart before the horse when I say that we are making plans for the future. Becka's brother David bought us breakfast and she ate bacon and pineapple! I think that there are many things she will be enjoying more now that hope has been restored.

I have to get back to work, but I just wanted to share our joy with all of you! Thank you so much for your words, actions, and prayers! God Bless you all, and I'll write some more tonight when I get back from picking up the kids!

Day 119

It's Monday evening and things are good. Becka had her Cat Scan this morning. It went well except for the stuff she had to drink. It was awful and made her gag, but I have to hand it to her, she drank it all. I don't know if I could have. Surely they can come up with something less horrid! We get her results back tomorrow morning. Pretty much everything is riding on those results as to whether or not they will continue on their present treatment. I just pray that we get the same news as we did the other day. She's been through so much and walked through all of it with Grace. If anyone deserves a break, it's her. The doctor will decide whether or not she will get a chemo treatment based on the results. I hope she doesn't need one because she's feeling so much better, and I desperately want her sense of taste to come back so she can enjoy her food again. No matter what, we are fighting this hand over fist until she is cancer free. Total remission is the only acceptable outcome. So many people are praying for her, and we are grateful for every one of you! 

Becka's brother David got here safely! He is going to the doctor with us in the morning. I wish he could stay longer, but he is only staying until Wednesday, then he's flying to Canada. He works for the Obama Administration and his job is to make sure the Pipeline never goes through. JUST KIDDING! That was just to make Ruth laugh! He is more conservative than I am. I'm really glad he's here. It puts Becka at ease when her family is near. I really hope we can get the families all together this year. 

I went to Taekwondo tonight. We did kicking drills until my legs almost fell off. It just isn't the same without Andrew. He won't be back until tomorrow night. I wouldn't enjoy it anywhere near as much if he and I didn't do it together, but I do love it and need it actually. Taekwondo is an outlet for me, and it's keeping me in as good of shape as I'm capable of. I'm grateful for the family member who is helping us financially with it. They wanted Andrew and me to continue and not disrupt his life any more than it already has been. The kids have actually been wonderful through all of this. Our lives as a family changed last October, and they will never be the same again. In some ways, it's a good thing. We have definitely become closer and we lean on each other more, and we also lean on God even more than that. He is the biggest part of our life, and all of our strength comes from him, usually through all of you. Becka has cancer, but it doesn't have her, and it definitely doesn't have us. We belong to the Lord, bought and paid for by Christ on the cross!

I will post the test results early tomorrow in my blog just as soon as we get them. God Bless all of you and thank you! I'm going to read a little then go to bed. Sweet dreams!

Day 118

It's Sunday night and a difficult one at that. Becka has a CAT scan in the morning, and she has to drink a bottle of Barium Sulfate tonight, and one tomorrow. It isn't going well. Apparently it tastes horrid, and she's struggling to get it down. She's a trooper though, and she's giving it her best effort. We have had a good day though. We ate breakfast with my Father, then we came back here and worked on the house. We pulled all of the weeds out of the flower garden, and planted some tomato plants. We still have a lot to do, but that's always the way. Nothing is ever truly finished.

She has to drink another of these awful bottles tomorrow morning before her procedure. I hate it because she gags on it and it upsets her, but I'm going to do my best to get it in her. They can't do the scan without it. God has been truly good and I know that this will all be a memory. I'm just as ready for it to end as she is.

I'm taking off work in the morning to be with her. I'll take my computer and will update while I'm there. She's not feeling well so we are going to bed. Good night and God Bless.